Thanksgiving Past...

The holiday is almost here.!!! YIPPEE.

Almost turkey day.

Yesterday I posted about my grandparents that are no longer with us.

Let me share about another set of grandparents (though both are still alive this is more about Gramma W than it is about Grandpa W) that are still here.

This set of grandparents are my stepdad's mom and dad. They are worlds and worlds away from my mom's parents. Just complete different people. ***

The same year we lost Gramma Stocking, Gramma W had surgery to bypass some veins in her legs. After the holiday she went in for a check up only to find major blockage and one vein had burst, showering blood into her lower leg.

It all happened so quickly; after a few short days she was on her death bed and they were talking amputation in order to save her. The amputation was performed, but her situation continued to look bleak. The family was asked to gather in the hospital, my aunt flew in from Arkansas, it was time for the family to say goodbye.

In a last ditch effort, the family had Gramma transferred to a more predominant hospital. They (we!) weren't ready to say goodbye for good unless there was a second more convincing opinion.

In the weeks after the transfer, she had lost her leg, but her life had been saved. She recovered and was able to come home. She had a new challenge in dealing with the amputated leg, but she was ALIVE. Something we had all thanked God for, she however wasn't as overly thankful.

She has said many times since that day that she'd wished they (we!) would have just "let her go" and her whole outlook on life has gone into the shitter since.

After we bought our house almost 4 years ago, we were "elected" to have Thanksgiving dinner at our house. We don't have a large home, but the layout is really conducive for large groups. I loved the idea of having dinner.

"A new tradition!" I thought. I stocked up on all the festive dishes and serving bowls, all in efforts to emulate my Gramma Stocking's holiday meals. There was so much food to be eaten.

My Gramma W, was however not real happy about it. In fact she was mad at me for even buying the house to begin with. Not because it was a great deal, in a great neighborhood, in great schools, but because she couldn't manage the stairs in her condition.

After failed attempts with her prosthetic and a depressed outlook on life, she was wheelchair bound. It was very difficult for the guys to get her up and down the stairs. She was embarrassed, she was depressed and it didn't go well. Even the dinner conversation was strained. In prayer before eating, her "Thanks God for keeping me here another year" dripped with sarcasm and disgust.

It was heart breaking. It is heart breaking.

After dinner, my Gramma W asked my Aunt to help her into the bathroom. So my loving Aunt did. After a while we were all sitting in the living room laughing, talking and just enjoying the fullness and company when an odd realization came over us.

Shit! Where is Gramma*?

As my aunt's cheeks reddened! She ran to the bathroom to find a very pissed off gramma. My Aunt was mortified and felt horrible and Gramma's tirade didn't help.

Gramma through clenched teeth, accused us all of forgetting her, leaving her in there on purpose. She claimed she had "beat" on the wall, but no one came for her. She scolded the size of the toilet not being handicap size. She was PISSED!

It was all sad and pathetic. My Aunt cried and cried. My gramma left in a flurry (as much as a woman in a wheelchair can flurry) and has never stepped foot into my house again.

The tradition of Thanksgiving at my house has forever been tainted with the episode. I don't think any of us will ever forget it. Thanksgiving is NOT ever to be held at my house unless she is dead, per her words. Nor will she attend any party hosted at my house. She hasn't kicked me out of the family (yet!) but pretty much disowned my house and any party happening there.

It wasn't all that funny at the time, but now two years later? Ha, the drama of it all. Sometimes if you look closely you will see hints of amusement in the rest of our eyes when we all sit down for Thanksgiving dinner. If you listen closely you might just hear little hidden jokes thrown around amongst us, ever so quietly and NEVER in Gramma's presence.**

Yes! So that is what happens when I host Thanksgiving.

Gramma's left in the bathroom and she can't get out. ***

I have tried to change the words to Gramma got ran over by a raindeer, but alas I am no poet.

*disclaimer, no Grammas were hurt the posting of this blog

**as guilty as I feel laughing about this...I am still laughing

***I do really love my grandparent's and when it is their time, they will be missed as well!