MUSHY ALERT.

The radio station I listed to was discussing these the other day...thought it might make for a good blog.

Here is where to find it online...
10 of the 15 signs that you're meant to be together.

1. You tell him things you don't tell anyone else. We don't mean blurting something out after you've had too much Merlot, but the desire to tell him intimate details about your life means you trust him—a major component of successful long-term love.

I am pretty much an open book, but eerily, Mr.FF reads me better than anyone.  Mr.FF reads me as if I've been a book on his shelf for as long as I have been one on my best friend Kimmy's shelf.

Kimmy knows me.  Kimmy knows how my brain works.  Kimmy gets me.
Mr.FF hasn't been close to me for as long, but KNOWS me, KNOWS how my brain works (which is scary), he gets me. 

So I am not sure I tell him things I wouldn't tell anyone else, but when I am stuffing emotions, justifying and dismissing feelings, he knows.  Nine times out of ten, just him knowing comforts me to share with him.  Ten times out of ten, I feel so much better after sharing those feelings no matter how juvenile or silly they are in my head.

2. You let him see you in moments of weakness. It's easy to be happy with someone when you're feeling good about life. But what about when you're not doing so well? Do you want to see him when you've been denied a raise, or your cat died or you had a plain old bad day? He should be a comfort during tough times, not a burden.

Weakness.  Why is it so important for me to be strong all the time?  Why is it so important for me to spew my unicorns and rainbows all over every situation?  Cause I do.  I am a very positive person.  When I break, I break for such short periods of time.  I pick myself up and eat a sack of happy. 

Letting Mr.FF in on my down times has been a little difficult for me, but completely unavoidable as stated above.  He just knows.

There are times that both of us have had to say, "give me some time" and let that space settle between us.  Time for (in my case) the internal dialogue to settle so as to better talk it out loud with him.

3. You respect him. You don't want to change the essence of who he is. There may be stuff that irritates you in everyday life—he insists on wearing his favorites, holey T-shirt, he eats sugar cereal for dinner, he still watches Saturday morning cartoons—but you like him, plain and simple.

This is incredible to me.  Before Mr.FF and I even started dating, my respect for him as a person, as a father to his children and as a friend was pretty high.

To say, I really like him, sounds so cliche yet so true. 

One of the obstacles that I saw when we talked about dating, when we made that leap is the risk of losing him as a friend, as a support, as someone that I trust and do respect if the whole romantic part of the relationship failed.

So far so good.  I still respect him and still really like him as a person and more importantly as his OWN person.

4. You want him to meet your parents. You feel proud of him and you want to show him off—as opposed to feeling like you have to make excuses for him.

I have been excited for all of my friends and family to meet Mr.FF...even if they've met him before (we did go to HS together and shared mutual friends).

I am more excited for those that I love to see how he and I just "work" together.  I am excited to show off this happiness that I feel has been lacking in my life for a very long time.

5. You can imagine a future together. You don't have to practice writing your first name with his last name, but do you periodically let your mind wander to picture a life together? Is it amazing?

HAHAHA.  This one makes me laugh.  Remembering back in my high school days, doodling my name with the last name of whoever I was dating at the time.

Those dreams of future were so immature.  Those dreams were so fairytale driven, with no base to them other than a long yearning to be loved and to love.

Right now I am so in love with what the kids and I have, on our own.  Right now I am so in love with what Mr.FF and I have together, but in separate households.  I don't foresee any change in that situation for a long time and I am completely content with that.

That is NOT to say that sure the idea has crossed my mind, but more in the "holy shit we'd need a bigger house" kind of way.  Ideally, or maybe it is more dreamily, we will make that move or that advancement in our relationship...when we're empty nesters.

*cheers to the elder years*

I think about our future as old people together.  I can see that.  I don't know if I've seen that or have chosen to forget about those visions with other relationships, but I can see it with MR.FF.

6. You're not afraid to disagree with him. You know that even if you fight, he'll listen to you and won't brush you off. He takes you seriously, even when he thinks you're wrong.

This has been a difficult concept for me to grasp...that brick wall that I hit my head on for so long with Capt'n Cancel has caused some brain damage. 

I am getting better, I think, about expressing my opinions without fear.  It only gets easier the more I do release my thoughts and have Mr.FF so respectful of my opinion even if he doesn't agree with it.  He's teaching me to be more relaxed by his actions.

7. You want to work out your major differences. If you do have crucial differences that will impact your future together—different opinions about religion, money or something else—you want to work them out with him, and you believe you can come to a conclusion that will satisfy both of you.

Maybe it's too early in the relationship, but I don't see any major differences.

*smoke pours out of ears*

Nope.  I don't see any major differences...unless he drastically changes his feelings about having another child...then we will have a problem.

No more babies.  Not with me

.

8. You laugh together. Laughter is one of life's simplest pleasures—you should definitely be able to crack each other up.

Given. This is something we have absolutely NO problem with at all. 

9. You're incredibly, utterly, surprisingly attracted to him. Physical chemistry is an undeniably important ingredient in a healthy relationship. And if he's not your usual "type"? Even more reason to think he's the one.

The "surprisingly" bothers me...not sure why.  However, when Mr.FF came back into my life, all I could picture was the boy he was in school...and he was just a boy.  He had a baby face...and he was so very little, barely 100 lbs wet.  I never gave him a second look back in school.  (Sorry babe.)

When we did see each other again, I immediately recognized him but thought, "Hmmm he's grown up nicely" and "He looks like a man now instead of a boy."  It caused enough for me to pause and give him a second look.

It is truly what I am attracted to most...tell me if this is odd...or not...and he will probably kill me for this but...SUCK IT UP IT IS WHAT I LOVE MOST ABOUT YOU.... I love the wrinkles around his eyes when he smiles, I love the receding hair line, I love the grey hair mixed with the red, I love the way he's aged.  I love that despite that "aged" part of him, he has the same boyish humor, boyish charm, and his smile and eyes have not changed but glow with happiness and love.

10. It's OK to be quiet around him. You don't feel like you have to fill the space between you with chatter or other interaction. Instead, you feel an easy comfort.

The other day we were sitting on the steps outside my house.  Talking, talking, talking.

I thought in that very minute, do we ever have quiet time between us?  Do we have that quiet time but it's comfortable enough that it doesn't stick out in my head?  This is so very nice.

*****

So there you, I don't know what any of that really means...if it means we are meant to be or not...BUT, I can confirm...that I am happy.  We will take each day at a time and *I* will cherish whatever time we do have together because me and him?  Him and I?  We are good together.